The post-it reads ‘are we doing the 2 step.’

This one requires explanation.

My father was in intensive care in California recently.

And the ENTIRE experience made me appreciate what families have been going through in the last 18 months.

To get into the hospital your temperature had to be taken.

Answer the reason for the visit today.

And then you had to present your covid vaccination card at the desk.

Wait for them to ring up to the floor to inform them of a visitor.

Give up your driver’s license.

Wait for approval of the floor.

Wait for the visitor sticker to be printed.

Wait for the sibling or mother who was visiting ahead of you to come down.

Get your visitor badge that they would place on you.

Get your driver’s license and covid card back.

And then be allowed to the elevator.

At the correct floor you had to present your badge and yourself to the security outside of the elevator.

To be told to go down to the hallway T and turn left.

Pick up the phone.

Speak to whoever picked up the phone.

And then be granted entrance.

See your dad.

But don’t visit too long.

He gets tired easily.

And there is someone else waiting for you to come down so they could go up.

But the 2 step on the post-it refers to their frankly inconsistent visiting rules.

On day A- 2 people could go up.

On day B part 1-1 person could go up.

On day B part 2- a second person got to go up.

To be challenged by the charge nurse as to why there were 2 visitors.

Um, your desk okayed it.

On day B part 3-1 person could go up.

All the parts on Day B happened in a thirty minute time frame.

The rest of the family, and there were 4 sometime 6 sometimes 7 of us.

Had to wait on the corner.

Or in the car at the parking garage that we had to pay for.

On any given day of the 4 days I was there the answer was never the same twice.

Of all the family I was the one best equipped to understand the stress that the nurses are under.

And I had a hard time with it sometimes.

If I, someone who has been working nearly every day for the past 18 months, couldn’t get it, then a family member who is also under immense stress would no chance of understanding the inconsistent rules and harsh tone that some of the nurses/security guards/management/doctors took with us.

And when informed that I am a nurse, my mom is a nurse, and my sister is a doctor you could almost see their eyes rolling.

Yeah, sure you are honey.

In three weeks I will be transitioning to a new job role.

That of the night call nurse.

Yes, I am terrified.

Yes, I will miss the OR as it is.

Yes, the cases will go on.

I am not disappearing.

I will be readily available.

All the data that I have in my noggin is only a text away.

I am doing this for a variety of reasons.

Going back to school.

Hopefully less work.

Do I consider myself as part of the “great resignation” that is going on in the greater job market right now?

No.

I would consider that to be the case if I chucked it all to become a full time writer.

Many thoughts were created for this transition.

That is another way of saying I have thought long and hard about this.

Being salary means that I will no longer have the ability to earn overtime.

That’s okay.

Overtime will be decreased by the very existence of this shift, whether or not it is me in the role.

Call hours are going to be vastly decreased due to the existence of the call shift.

Being salary means I will no longer take extra call.

I am surprisingly okay with this.

Call is life.

Call is my favorite.

This new job means that I get to only do call.

The pace I was working at was going to become unsustainable.

Not because I couldn’t do it.

But because the corporation would have eventually jobbed out the extra things that I do.

And the big one.

I can no longer class myself as the evening charge nurse.

That is also okay.

I’ve done that a LONG time now.

Maybe it is time to let some oxygen into the department.

People who don’t think they can do call absolutely can.

Their call shifts will be widely spread apart.

I offered to cover while they hired and trained into my position.

They said no.

In three weeks, one of which I had off as I was supposed to be in London. Again. It is time.

Time to start a new adventure.

Since I am going to be the only nurse in the department again with this new gig can I consider myself the night charge nurse?

Asking for a friend who is me.

The thing about Cookie Thursday is a Thing that not everyone understands is that I take requests under advisement.

If someone asks for a specific cookie I will try to incorporate the cookie into the theme.

A friend asked me to make the spooky cookies, AKA the dark chocolate Reese’s Pieces again.

And I was going to include them into my Halloween Spectacular.

Yeah, the same one that I’ve had to cancel the last two years running.

And this year as well.

As I was visiting my father in the hospital 3000 miles away.

There were still cookies though.

I had a volunteer guest baker.

Someone said pretty please make them again.

The claim is that they were the best ever.

There was a lounge poll and everything.

I made them again this week.

It is a more appropriate week as it is after time “fell back” last week.

The entire batch was gone in less than an hour.

With different coworkers telling me they were the best ever.

There wasn’t a poll, although one told me he saved his cookie to eat on the way home.

I remember being a child in Denver, Colorado and going to the Veteran’s Day parade.

Denver had the best parades.

My dad would buy me and my sisters little red flowers on green wire and tell us to wear them.

To remember the fallen soldier.

When I was in elementary school it didn’t mean much.

I got a flower!

I got something pretty to wear on my Catholic uniform.

As I got older the meaning became clearer.

There were soldiers that did not get to come home.

And red poppies are won in remembrance.

Because war is hell and we should always remember this who gave their lives to defend us.

We should also remember those who have served and are struggling.

We should also remember those who continue to serve.

When I joined the Air Force Veteran’s Day became more stark.

I participated in a memorial run.

There would be someone running on the track for the entire 24 hours of Veteran’s Day.

I ran 14 miles that day.

At the time it was the most I had ever run.

10 years ago I decided that I was no longer going to be using the phrase “Happy Veteran’s Day.”

Because nothing about war is happy.

I use the word Good to preface the word Veteran.

Because nothing about war, or preparing for war, is happy.

Good Veteran’s Day to all who have served, are serving, or who are preparing to serve.

Cases have been plummeting.

Off a cliff if you read some articles.

I have certainly noticed such a phenomenon in our hospital.

The ER patient volume has gone way down.

The number of respiratory isolation patients has dropped precipitously.

From a full page of at least 10.

To a handful.

To single digits

I remember how excited I was before the delta wave struck in June/July.

Apparently it was a false sunrise then.

But there are still troubling data points coming in.

In Eastern Europe and Europe cases are rising.

Russia is still posting huge numbers of deaths.

I would like to say the worst is behind us.

But I have been burned before.

I would like to see a true sunrise of the pandemic ending.

As a fantasy aficionado I am concerned.

Although the past 18 months have been grueling.

And hard.

And plod one foot in front of the other.

A sudden decrease in cases and deaths.

Like the one we are experiencing now.

Seems too easy.

Too easy, you shriek?

Yeah.

Too easy.

I hope it is true.

The post- it reads ‘nursing instructors in the OR.’

That’s it.

In its entirety.

Luckily, I remember why I wrote that note.

There was a senior nursing student who was being exposed to the OR as part of her curriculum.

This is a vastly different way from when I was first in nursing school.

When it came time for me to do my nurse shadowing in the last six weeks of nursing school I had to FIGHT to be allowed in the OR.

I had to have several meetings with my instructors, with my advisors, with the dean of the nursing school.

It was not a done thing to allow a student nurse to go to the area that she wanted as a graduate.

The reasons were many, and vast.

This was back when the OR was notoriously hard to break into.

We were supposed to be happy with our 1 clinical day in the OR.

To be happy with being stationed at the wall and told not to touch anything blue.

We didn’t get to participate at all.

I am very glad times have changed.

I did prevail in the end and got to spend my last 6 clinical weeks in the OR.

Shadowing a nurse.

It did not dent my desire/need to be an OR nurse.

All it did was make me tired as I continued to work my Thursday-Tuesday job as a certified nurses aid.

And more determined than ever to be an OR nurse.

In today’s lingo ‘I shook the haters off’.

Don’t worry.

I am still uncool.

But this student,

She got 6 weeks as well, mirroring her assigned nurse’s schedule.

But her instructor.

Her instructor came twice to check in on her.

He did not dress out.

He chose the absolutely busiest time of 1430-1530 to have conversations with her.

They had their conversation at the desk.

I would have found them a separate space.

Where they were not in the position to be mowed down.

But, as we know, and I’ve complained and been told, I’m not in charge until 1700.

This nursing instructor knew nothing about the OR.

As evidenced by his questioning of the nursing student and her job role.

He was surprised when told that the OR does not give medication to the patient, but to the field.

He was surprised when told that patient interaction was very limited as there was not a lot of time for a full assessment.

OR nurses do a focused assessment.

OR nurses do very limited patient education.

OR nurses do care planning but it is focused to the case, and keeping the patient safe during the case.

After the experience of this nursing student and her explanations of how the nursing instructor knew nothing about the OR but was still assigned to her, I am beginning to wonder if I should not reach out to the nursing programs around here and actually, you know, put my MSN to work.

Sometimes you just have to be.

Doing nothing.

Although there is plenty to do.

Going no where.

Although there is plenty to see.

You just have to be.

You just have to sit in the silence with a good book.

And do nothing.

It is harder than it looks.

I needed a day just to be.

To sleep when I was tired.

To eat when I was hungry.

To do something when I wanted to.

Tomorrow the world can start again.

But today…

I will just be.

The theme for November for Cookie Thursday is a Thing is Fall.

And the first cookie of the month is sweet potato.

Sometimes, often, I find pumpkin to be too common.

There are many, many things flavored pumpkin spice.

Boring.

But fall as the theme could be in reference to things other than the autumn.

It could be a mechanical fall.

It could be about emotions.

You know what they say-

Falling is just like flying, except there is a more permanent destination.

This was how James Moriarty taunted Sherlock Holmes.

It is true, though.

There is a permanent destination to fall.

Could be caused by gravity.

Could be halted by winter.

One of my goals for dispatches from the evening shift was the apply for a PhD in nursing program.

I applied to a state university back in September.

That was a very long time ago.

I am trying to grow as a person and not put all my eggs in one basket.

I’ve done that before.

I applied to only Creighton as a high schooler.

It was the only college I applied to.

I decided, 14 years later, to go back for my BSN.

I only applied to Chamberlain.

When I decided to get my MSN?

You guessed it.

I only applied and was accepted to one college.

I’m trying not to be that person anymore.

Therefore I am applying to THREE (3) universities who have a PhD in nursing.

As I am investigating the admission processes I am finding that there will need to be 3 references, preferably in healthcare, preferably with PhDs themselves.

I don’t know that I know 3 nurses with their PhDs.

The nurse scientist as my current hospital corporation has her PhD.

She kind of knows me.

I have sent her an email.

The nurse manager on one of the Med-Surg units has her PhD.

I serve on a committee with her.

I have asked her if we can have a conversation or three about maybe choosing her to be the second PhD nurse.

I know OF a few more PhD nurses.

In AORN, at colleges, with the credentialing company that I get the CNOR from.

Should I cast my net wide?

Just like I am doing with the universities?

I think I will mock up an introductory email and just ask.

Making friends as an adult, and networking among other nurses as an introvert is hard.

5 million plus dead from the covid-19 pandemic.

World wide.

Personally, I think is a huge undercount.

Cases are rising in Britain due to the new variant, the delta plus.

Very glad my husband talked me out of going in December.

The airline credit will just have to wait.

Cases are rising in Russia, not that the medical community knows much.

Vaccinations are increasing, although I heard that much of it was due to boosters being given.

Hopefully, vaccinations for the 5-12 set will have full CDC approval tomorrow.

Many families are waiting on that.

We have workers re-siding the house right this second.

All the hammers.

The banging.

They are not wearing masks up on the ladders.

And neither would I expect them to.

However, the foremen who want to talk to us?

Absolutely should be wearing masks.

It drives my husband crazy.

Mask mandate is still active where I live.

The test positivity rate has not dropped below that threshold.

Yes, cases may be down where you live.

This does not give you permission to be stupid,