Not normally something I would post about.

But finished the taxes today.

They are due tomorrow.

Husband insisted I finish them tonight.

So we could get our payment in before midnight.

A day early?

Not going to lie.

It hurt.

It hurt a lot.

Bear in mind we have no children, no dependents, only cats.

And they are not write-off-able.

And I worked a lot this last pandemic year.

Alot, a lot.

Because, you know, pandemic.

Hospital needs must be met.

And it showed in my take home pay.

And it showed in how much was taken out for taxes.

We paid the taxman many thousands of dollars.

Because it is just being good citizens.

However, what about healthcare workers sacrifices over the past year?

The hours in the N-95 masks, covered in another mask because there is a shortage.

The hours in the coveralls, and boots, and faceshields.

The worry we might bring covid home to our families.

The double shifts.

The volunteer shifts.

The must go to work every day spirit.

Even though the pandemic is crushing our spirits.

The anxiety.

The depression.

The bitten down fingernails.

Oh, that last one might just be me.

Is it any wonder I began carrying an emotional support stuffed animal in my bag recently?

Is it any wonder healthcare workers are leaving the field?

26-29% in the cursory search I did.

At least that in my department.

Another nurse announced his retirement on Friday.

I wonder why.

This past week the CDC came out with the recommendation that if you are fully vaccinated, you do not have to wear a mask in public or social distance.

My state jumped on it and rescinded the state mask mandate.

Many businesses did as well: Walmart, Trader Joe’s, Publix.

I went to Trader Joe’s this morning.

And there were very limited people who were not wearing a mask.

I counted 2.

I am fully vaccinated, have been since January, and you bet I was wearing a mask.

Remember, they stopped the mask mandate, if you are fully vaccinated.

There is no way to check the vaccination status of customers, unless you ask.

It is putting the burden on the stores.

Because of people who will lie, obfuscate, fib.

And I am wondering if cases are going to go up within 3 weeks because people are stupid.

As Darth Vader says in return of the Empire Strikes Back, “Search your feelings, you know it to be true.”

I have two evening techs who split the week.

One works 3 evenings, the other 2.

The one who works 2 had surgery last week.

Yay for her (this was a long anticipated surgery).

Boo for me and the evening shift.

She will be out for 12 weeks.

Okay. I make the schedule and I have 15 other techs to rotate through her shifts.

I made a rotation, and scheduled people with it.

It was fair and equitable.

And if one of the day techs works an evening shift, they are schedule off the next day.

Same way it has always been done.

But day shift complained.

“It is too much.”

Um, it is only one shift a month.

They may have missed the fairness part of it.

It works out to ONLY one shift a month.

Schedule got posted on Sunday, to start in 2 weeks.

Wednesday, my assistant nurse manager pulls me into her office and said that some of the day shift techs had an idea.

They wanted to do their evening shifts on call.

ON CALL!

And they only want to be in the department if there is a case.

This means that I would be alone in the department.

I would do all of the evening shift chores: pulling cases if any left, pulling instruments if not done, cleaning rooms, stocking rooms, setting up any OR except for our call room.

By myself.

Plus all of my own charge nurse chores.

And if a case comes in I have to call them in, at a premium, to come do the case that I have scheduled, pulled, opened, and sometimes prepped the patient myself.

cool, cool.

On one hand I can be assured the work is done completely, and well.

On the other, I will not have to shepherd staff through the evening shift chores.

On another, I find this incredibly insulting to the tech out on leave, de-valuing her work like this.

On another, I will not have to find them work to do, because they are incapable of thinking/seeing what needs to be done and doing it without being told.

On yet another, I find this incredibly insulting to all the evening shift workers.

Again, this is not how it is to be valued.

I have to wonder, if this is a way to get rid of the shift all together.

Or of seeing how much I am willing to put up with before I leave.

Day shift wins again with their shitty ideas that leaves them without doing the tedious work.

Again.

This has been the oddest week.

On Monday, I agreed to serve as the regional shared governance market chair.

It is a role I have had before.

I will be in it for 7 months, long enough to prepare the next chair for service next year.

It is needed because of the nurses stepping down or leaving the region because of the pandemic.

My department and hospital is having its share of these losses as well.

Now my chair elect and myself have to figure out how to get nurses excited about shared governance.

The shared governance group had been speaking at new employee orientation to introduce new nurses to the concept of shard governance.

This part has been deleted with the pandemic and the retooling education did for orientation.

I have encouraged the CNO of the region to bring it back.

Tuesday was astoundingly busy.

Appy, appy, dislocated hip, appy.

Wednesday night was the same, but only with 2 appendixes, not three.

Wednesday was also the day that a good nurse friend of mine, who had cheerleaded me through my masters, told me her role was changing and she was going to work for the other region.

I have not done shared governance without her.

I hope I can rise to the challenge.

Today, which is Thursday, was like slogging through cement.

This week for Cookie Thursday is a Thing happens to be during Nurse’s Week.

Okay.

It is one day off from Florence Nightingale’s birthday.

Normally I would make something in honor of her.

However, this being chocolate chip month, I am going to make cream cheese chocolate chip cookies.

And I am going to start my sourdough starter for two weeks.

So I can make sourdough cookies then.

Happy Nurse’s Week everyone!

Happy Mother’s Day to all the mothers out there.

While I am not lucky enough to be in your numbers.

I have a mother.

And she is awesome.

She was disappointed with me when I declared my intention to go to nursing school.

Because it is hard, back-breaking, sometimes soulless work.

Not unlike what I imagine motherhood to be.

But I graduated and followed in her footsteps.

And I could not be happier.

Except for this pandemic.

shrugs

May is a new month.

This means a new theme.

It is easier to have themes.

This organizes me.

Allows me to plan hard cookies in advance.

The humble chocolate chip cookie has many, many variations.

This week I made brown butter chocolate chip cookies.

I also shamed the OR with pictures of cookies left behind from last week.

There were no cookies left behind this week.

Got to love when a plan comes together.

May this year’s nurse’s week be happier.

And healthier.

To kick of nurse’s week, I stayed up WAY too late last night to finish the cookies for today.

And I took a PALS class and then worked.

I am on call right now, fingers crossed.

Tomorrow I will be vaccinating people from 0800-1200.

This is my first vaccine clinic after the slowdown of patients.

We will see how it goes.

But thank a nurse, will you.

I told my mom about the issues/troubles that were brought up to me last weekend.

You know, the ones that I was too good at call.

At least that is how I am perceiving it.

She said not to listen to them.

There is no shame at being good at your job.

However, she encouraged me to write the president of the hospital, who the MD referenced and ask for a meeting.

To explain how and why the current system we have in place for being called in works like it does.

And in order to satisfy MDs, we should keep it in place.

I have to think about this, and maybe run it past my boss.

She is a currently practicing RN of nearly 50 years experience.

She is my mentor.

More on her later.

Graduation is tomorrow.

And I will be watching the live stream from home.

Because they have the graduation locked up tight.

Tickets were supposed to be sent out this week, just before the event.

And they were sent out 10 days ago.

And the subject line read something about tickets.

And the email was from the event center, not the college.

So I deleted them.

I don’t need tickets to minor league baseball.

Which is what the event will be held at.

When I recognized my mistake, from another email from the college.

The trash function had deleted them.

Apparently I can only keep 1 week of deleted emails in the trash folder.

Who knew?

And then the emails cannibalize themselves.

So I have a plain cap and gown that I had set aside after graduation was cancelled last year.

Because a decorated cap is verboten.

And no tickets.

And my husband received his second covid vaccine on Thursday and he is not feeling his best.

If I had the tickets, there would be no one in the bleachers for me.

I will stay home, put my cap and gown on and watch the live stream from the comfort of my office chair.

My sister was going to go with us.

Maybe I can tempt her to lunch instead.

I will still throw my cap up.

I received my diploma already.