25- Dreamies

No, not the kind that you have in bed while you are asleep.

Let me explain.

This is the second week of the Baking the Freezer theme for March. Where I delve into my freezer and make up cookies based on the ingredients.

I was in the kitchen freezer and I realized that there were two(!) frozen loaves of bread. Which created something of a quandary. I could make croutons but would people like them as a Cookie Thursday is a Thing offering? I also still have a boatload of cheese in the fridge. Perhaps another Why is There Still So Much Cheese month?

No, no, Kate, stop getting distracted.

Back to the recipe books. I saw this vintage recipe for itty bitty grilled cheese looking bites. They go by different names, depending on the era, but the earliest recipe I was able to find was from 1910.

Bread, cheese, butter, spices. What can go wrong?

The uniqueness of this recipe is that the cheese goes on the outside and the butter goes on the inside of the itty bitty sandwiches. And then they are baked. Kind of like a reverse grilled cheese. Interesting. Y’all know I like an interesting cookie. Even though this is a bake.

I think a dab of mustard powder in the butter mixture might set this one up well.

Hours later…

The Cookie Thursday is a Thing offering has been made at the hospital.

The best thing I can write about this is to trust the process.

The best advice that I can write is to bake it on a warm enough day so that the all the windows in the house can be opened.

Because this recipe? Is a smoky one. Not smoke as in “eek, there is a fire”. But smoky as in the ingredients gave off a lot of fragrant steam. Or I need to clean my oven. Or a combination of the two.

The taste is 10/10. Would absolutely do again, perhaps with a bit of Worcerstershire sauce.

I am off to clean my top oven.

Best Kept Secrets of the OR #23-the quiet ones are the ones propping up healthcare

Population studies are fascinating. Who we are and what makes us tick as a society is very interesting. There are the loud ones that suck up all the energy in a room. Who demand all the attention and woe to the ones who get in their way.

They might not be correct but damned if they aren’t sure that they are. Any attention to them is good attention. In today’s parlance, they are the “pick me” group. Often at the cost to other people. Especially at a cost to other people.

Think of Johnny in the movie Airplane!. Always there with a quip, always there to unplug the runway lights. Anything for a little attention.

I find this group exhausting. Thankfully, this is not the vast percentage of society. We would all be exhausted all the time.

There are the in-betweeners. The group that wants attention, but the right kind of attention is best. These are the ones who plod along and are okay if they are recognized sometimes. It doesn’t have to be all of the time.

It’s all good to them.

Then there is the third group.

The quiet ones.

AKA the overlooked ones.

The ones who work quietly in the background, hitting all their metrics, hitting all their targets. Caring for their patients, often skipping lunches without the bosses knowing because it was what was best at the time. After all, they can eat later. Sometimes in the car on the way home

The ones who volunteer for extra hours so that the loud one who has been complaining about not getting their fifth vacation of the year approved (and it’s only March). Not because they want to work the extra hours but just to shut the pick me one up.

The ones who are rarely recognized for being the team players that they are.

Yeah, them.

This is an under-estimated and under-understood segment of the OR and, really, all of healthcare.

The under the radar workers who might as well be screaming “Don’t notice me!”.

Them.

The ones who are never nominated for awards, not because they are not worthy of recognition but it bothers them to be in the spotlight. And so they just toil away in the background.

Until they don’t. Then the lack of their presence is noticed.

Big time.

And they are blamed because group 1 and group 1 feel the lack.

Do yourself a favor. Befriend one of them. Be nice to them.

It’s like the lab personnel. Be nice.

Maybe they won’t leave.

Because your department won’t feel or run the same without them.

Tuesday Top of Mind 3/11/2025-Happy Birthday, Covid-19.

Happy Birthday, Covid-19.

It was 5 years ago today that the World Health Organization declared Covid-19 a pandemic.

The post I wrote last year on this date was that I was at work. Of course I was at work. I wrote that lockdown and elective cases stoppage, masks were a few days away.

Listen.

The WHO and the CDC and Anthony Fauci did the best they could with the wildly gyrating situation that was wrestling with a very deadly, very real pandemic.

Most people don’t care about that.

Most people only care about how a situation impacts them. Until they or their family member is the one on the vent. Or can’t get a bed because there are literally no beds or no vents available.

Remember New York? And the thousands of people who were sick in late winter, early spring, all the way to summer 2020? Remember the refrigerator truck morgues waiting outside of hospitals? Remember the Of course you don’t.

But those of us in healthcare that were sidelined because of the pause in elective cases remember. Well, some of us do.

Some of us who worked on the front lines in those dark days remember. Even if it makes us sad.

There was just a spike in December/January. Not that the U.S. would know. The current death toll on the CDC website is 735 in the first week of March 2025. The total death toll is hard to find at the CDC site and I spent a lot of time poking around looking for it.

The global death rate for covid is 7,090,890. It is hard to get a current death toll for the U.S, but I did find a number on the Worldometer site. That number is one million, two hundred nineteen thousand, four hundred eighty-seven. Americans dead from covid in 5 years.

Spare me the explanation that some of those dead in the U.S. were illegal immigrants.

Remember that it is still sickening people and they are being hospitalized, sometimes on vents? Yes, even today.

Covid taught the world many lessons.

However, it also gave rise to rampant misinformation and death threats against the very people who were trying to help us survive.

Remember that?

So Happy Birthday, Covid-19. May the lessons that you tried to teach us about humanity and resilience sink in someday. Preferably before the next pandemic.

We are flying blind and, as a healthcare worker and registered nurse, these remain scary times. Not only because 75% of the population shrug and go on with their lives, but because the U.S. has left the WHO and the CDC is likewise hamstrung. Research dollars and research at the major research centers, such as universities, are being affected by what they can research and what they can’t. And that list is horrifyingly anti-women, anti-LGBTQIA, and anti-science.

Good times to be in research. (This is sarcasm. So much sarcasm.)

Post-it Sunday 3/9/25- 29 ways

The post-it reads “29 ways to make it to the hospital”.

This is, of course, in the reference to the Marc Cohn song 29 Ways to Make it to My Baby’s Door. Yes, the same Marc Cohn who sang Walking in Memphis. Both songs are from his debut album in 1991.

Marc Cohn was the first bar concert I ever saw. I want to say it was in 1996 and in a small bar in the college town near where I grew up. Between 1993-1996

In the song, the protagonist lists off the ways he can make it to his baby’s door. Near the end of the song he sings that if she needs him real bad, he can find two or three more.

I know that people already think that I have an unnatural attachment to the hospital. I don’t, I swear. I do have an unnatural attachment to work, though I am trying my best to overcome it.

But I was thinking of mass casualty events when I wrote this post-it. Probably after one of the hospital shootings we’ve had nationally for a lot of years. Or being the second runner up to Oklahoma City when I was at Creighton. If that is even true, we talked about it in clinical just after it happened.

However, if the hospital needed me in a hurry, and they have, I could get to it, at night, in less than 5 minutes. This depends on hitting the lights right and no traffic.

However, I thought about it and counted the many ways I know how to get to the hospital during the day. I counted at least 10. And I only live 3 miles from the hospital.

Those are the 10 that I have found. There is probably more.

It just depends on how badly they need me.

And the traffic lights.

International Womens Day March 8th

Much like declining to wish people a “Happy Veterans Day”, I will also be declining to wish women a “Happy International Women’s Day”. This is for many of the same reasons.

There is nothing happy about this.

Google and Apple took it off of their calendars.

In an obvious sop to more than half of the country, Google did incorporate 5 images into its search page. An atom, a double helix strand of DNA, an Erlenmeyer flask, a dinosaur skull, and an astronaut in full gear.

And that’s it.

It is up to us to decipher which scientist or woman matches up with each image.

The atom is a bit of a head thumper to start us off. I imagine that it is supposed to represent Marie Curie. I guess. One of her TWO Nobel prizes is in physics.

The double helix of DNA is much easier to parse. Rosalind Franklin was the woman who took Photo 51, the first x-ray picture that clearly showed the double strands. Her work was stolen by the heralded discoverers of DNA, without her permission. She was robbed of the Nobel prize when the two men who had taken her data did not credit her. Worse, they tried to cover up this fact by saying that she couldn’t grasp the concept of DNA.

Bitch, please.

The Erlenmeyer flask is meant to be the contributions of all women in chemistry? I guess. It’s not really clear. There have been a lot of women in chemistry, after all.

The dinosaur skull could represent Dorothy Garrod. She was the one who first explained that the First Mesozoic era encompassed the history of man. Or perhaps it is representing the first woman archeologist, Margaret Murray, who worked in the late nineteenth and early twentieth centuries. There have also been a lot of women in archeology.

The astronaut could be any number of women. The first woman in space was Valentina Tereshkova. She orbited the Earth for 3 days in June 1963.

If you click through the Google doodle, it is just a celebration of women in STEM. No woman is named specifically by name.

But we know or can guess at the inspiration for each doodle image.

Women in science and STEM is an international effort.

One that we have to give all respect for and homage to.

But it isn’t enough. What other woman has had her data stolen or was forced to give her work to a man for recognition? There remains a lot of work to do.

One thing that must be acknowledged is the contributions that are not STEM related. Because the entire world and all of its discoveries are not solely STEM related. To act as if it is devalues the woman writers and thinkers and philosophers who have fought and bled and died and were forgotten for their contribution to the current world.

Despite the men. Not because of them.

But we still have to recognize that all these women were once girls. And these girls had books.

Cookie Thursday 3/6/2025- The CTIAT No Buy Month AND Bake the Freezer Month mash-up

The February theme was Bake the Baking Pantry. This was a month where I used the special ingredients that I already had in the baking pantry. Things like different kinds of chips and even a wine syrup from a forgotten in the fridge bottle of wine from Christmas.

I have been judiciously buying ingredients for CTIAT for as long as I have spearheaded it. By that I mean that I strategically buy ingredients for the month’s theme.

Some of the themes were Inflation Baking and the Eggceptional theme, the last time egg prices were egregious. This let me expand my cookie offerings while still keeping the price reasonable.

But I always managed to buy some ingredient during the month, be it flour or sugar or eggs. I just wanted to keep on theme.

This month’s theme was going to be Baking the Freezer and I will keep to the theme. But I will add to the theme by doing a CTIAT No Buy month. If there is an ingredient in the freezer that requires me to buy an additional ingredient to make it work, I will keep the ingredient in the freezer.

By the way, the Bake the Baking Pantry did not even put a dent in my supplies so there will probably be an additional month of that.

Off to inventory the freezer.

…

Okay, I’m back. There are many vacuum sealed bags of peaches that I chucked in there after I got over-zealous and bought a bushel of peaches.

That will be the freezer ingredient today.

Peach cobbler style cookies.

I have baked them and I have to say they are some of the prettiest cookies that I’ve made.

See picture for details.

Best Kept Secrets of the OR #22- FAQ of friends

FAQ means frequently asked questions.

Today I got a phone call from a spouse of a friend I hadn’t heard from in years. Damned degrees and the time and attention sink they are!

During the call, they asked me not where I’ve been as I kind of dropped off the radar because of school and the gym closing. Instead, they asked me one of the FAQs all healthcare workers get, who would I see for X problem?

This is one of the most frequent questions that we get. Presumably, us healthcare workers know the best doctors/surgeons and our friends and family want to know.

It is the highest mark of respect that we can give these doctors and surgeons to refer a friend or family member.

This friend called me because I had referred them to the surgeon who replaced their knee a bunch of years ago. Now they wanted information on a sports surgeon. Of course I gave them a couple of names. I ranked them as well, telling them that Dr. X was my favorite.

And then I asked them not to tell Dr. X that they were my favorite.

They laughed and we chatted for a few more minutes but they said were going to call the surgeons as soon as they got off the phone with me.

I rang off, after telling them to give their spouse my best and vowing that I would reach out to them.

Even as we give recommendations as healthcare workers, we have to keep in mind the different personalities and expertise of the different surgeons. After all, the total knee surgeon might not be the best fit when the request is a sports surgeon. Not that the total knee surgeon couldn’t do the sports surgery, but that they might not be the correct fit for the request.

No, I am not talking about the look at your rash/bump/do I think the bone is broken FAQs.

Because ew.

That might not be the kind of relationship we have.

Tuesday Top of Mind 3/4/2025- The real tragedy of modern times is being afraid of the light

The proper quote, attributed to Plato, can be summarized by “The real tragedy of life is when people are afraid of the light.”

The PhD student in me knows that this is a reference to Allegory of the Cave. Also by Plato.

In the cave the only perspective is that of what is projected on the walls. What you see projected on the walls is entirely left up to your own experiences.

For example, if a republican was attracted to a drag queen they would question their manliness and therefore be afraid of drag queens exposing their secrets. But they can’t be afraid of something so silly, so they hate it. Worse, they teach others to hate the shadows on the wall of the drag queen as well.

Oh. This argument got a bit away from me. I don’t mean to point fingers, but if the pattern on the wall fits…

The Allegory of the Cave is also about truth. It is a warning not to take the easy path and believe everything your eyes tell you.

Or believe what the voice on the television or podcast tells you.

Critical thinking is a must, especially in these times when the wrong voices and the wrong actions are vying for our attention and our belief.

In simpler terms and the phrase I remember hearing or reading as a child, that what you hate is something that frightened you as a child. Instead of another person just trying to live their life, they are hated as other.

Well, going back to the cave, who decides the other.

And, more importantly, why do we listen and sometimes blindly follow the hatred that is spoon fed to us in increasing amounts? Perhaps in the hopes that we will drown in filth and be reborn hating the things that caused us to be drowned. Instead of real fear of those who drowned us.

To make light of it, perhaps they were frightened by a drag queen as a child.

As Master Yoda says, “Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.”

Don’t walk the dark path.

And don’t believe what other people are telling you about the shadows on the wall.

They may get something out of frightening you.

School Me Saturday 3/1/25- Into the unknown

Colleges and universities are widely and wildly unsettled at the moment.

Much like those of us who are burdened with empathy.

There are some who don’t know better that are cheering the unrest. I hope they don’t know better. Otherwise I am forced to conclude that they are terrible people. People who relish in the difficulties of others.

Not so very far removed from the bullies that I railed against yesterday.

With a swipe of a pen and, I imagine, an unholy grin, much of the research landscape was decimated.

There are those who rush in and wish to dance upon the ashes.

I hope they don’t require any help from the research that has been destroyed by the mad one’s whims. Nor any of their families.

As we are barreling past the point of no return in getting the flu vaccine formulated and prepared for the start of the fall flu vaccine campaign, I hope that this upcoming flu season won’t bite them in the ass.

I will certainly be masking up if there is no 2025 flu vaccine.

But students and professors alike are in unsettled times.

I know I am.

And I don’t know how to react.

Part of me wants to wash my hands of the whole thing and hope for the best.

After all, healthcare workers JUST lived through a global pandemic and we are staring down the barrel at another. With less than half of the tools that we had in 2020 with covid 19, and even less than those tools for the 2013 Ebola outbreak that wished it was a pandemic, and even less than the SARS in 2002, and less still than the swine flu in 2008.

Still we educate others and seek education for ourselves.

I have no answers.

May whatever god you believe in have mercy on your soul.

Because those in power who are giddy and bloated with it certainly won’t.

FFS Friday 2/28/25- Facing down the bully

Fuck bullies.

I have been open about my past bullying experiences in school. I mean c’mon, glasses, read a lot, can’t run very fast, always had the right answers in class, I was a sitting duck.

The thing about a history of being bullied is that you either join the bully ranks or you hate the bullies.

All the bullies.

I hate the bullies.

Probably why I am successful when I shout down a bully surgeon. I don’t like bullies and bullying will not happen in my OR.

What I witnessed today was a group of grown ass men bullying a weaker country.

No.

Zelensky was vastly outnumbered but he held his own.

One of the last things I have seen on the subject was his response on why he doesn’t wear a suit to meet the president. To these overgrown frat boys this is a sign of disrespect.

Eye roll.

When it is simply that the wearing of a suit to him is normalizing the struggles his country is going through. Not wearing a suit is an act of protest. And then he likens wearing a suit to wearing a costume.

Find the clip. Well worth your time.

But the overall feeling that I got from the clips that I have seen is that of a man not bending to the will of the US president, no matter the heat that he got from that stable of assholes witnessing this. He didn’t kowtow to the bullying that was going on.

That deserves my respect.

And a cringe of the attempted bullying that was going on.

He faced down the bullies with a few words and actions.

Good for him.

Apparently the current role of the US government is that of a thug trying to shake down those that are weaker.

Lovely. I hate that for us.

Fuck the bullies.